How EMDR Intensive Can Help Heal Body Image Trauma Rooted in Childhood

I spent most of my life believing that something was wrong with my body — and, by extension, something was wrong with me.

Growing up in Taiwan, I was always the “bigger girl.” In a culture that prized smallness, I stood out — and not in the way anyone celebrated. After puberty, most of my classmates hovered around 40–50 kg. I was in the 60s. My weight wasn’t just noticed — it was policed. My parents made regular comments: “Your uncle said you should lose weight.” “Aren’t you ashamed of how you look?” “I’m telling you this because no one else will.”

These weren’t one-time comments. It was daily. A thousand paper cuts. I was put on every diet imaginable — no dinner, only cabbage soup, even a full liquid diet that left me with stretch marks I still carry. I learned early that love came with conditions: shrink yourself to be acceptable.

I didn’t know it then, but what I was living through was body image trauma — a combination of emotional neglect, control, shame, and disconnection from my own body. Like many clients I work with now, I internalized the belief that my worth depended on being smaller, quieter, and more pleasing. I learned to fear hunger and ignore my body’s signals. I punished myself through “healthy” eating, overexercising, and chasing perfection.

It wasn’t until I started working with my own trauma therapist that things began to shift. I was introduced to Health at Every Size, intuitive eating, EMDR, and eventually to IFS and Somatic Experiencing.

“Jane” I-Chen Liu, MA. LMHC | Trauma Therapist | EMDR, IFS, and Somatic Experiencing

Why EMDR Intensive Changed Everything

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) helps us reprocess painful, stuck memories so they no longer define how we see ourselves. For me, EMDR softened the harsh voices of my past — my parents’ constant criticism, the shame of failed diets, and the memory of standing on a scale, wishing I could just disappear.

With the intensive format — 3 to 6 hours of therapy per day — we’re able to go deep without interruption. There’s space for the nervous system to settle, feel safe, and finally release what it’s been holding for years.

In traditional weekly EMDR therapy, you may only get to process one memory per session. Sometimes the memory doesn’t feel fully resolved, and you have to hold onto it for another week before continuing. That gap can be frustrating and even destabilizing.

The beauty of an EMDR Intensive is that we stay in the healing process. One memory might naturally lead to another, and we can follow that thread in real time — helping you move through layers of trauma in one contained, supported setting. This allows the healing to happen more efficiently and deeply, without the constant stop-start of weekly sessions.

For many clients, EMDR Intensives offer a profound sense of momentum — like years of therapy condensed into days.

How IFS and Somatic Work Support Healing

In our work together, I weave in Internal Family Systems (IFS) to connect with the parts of you that still feel ashamed, unlovable, or stuck in old patterns. When it comes to food and body image, many of us carry parts that developed extreme roles just to keep us safe.

You might have a manager part that closely monitors how much you eat, pushes you to exercise, and tells you to stay “on track.” This part believes that if you can just be thinner, more disciplined, more acceptable, you’ll finally avoid criticism or rejection. It’s working hard to protect you — not to hurt you — but to shield you from the pain you’ve felt in the past.

On the other hand, you may also have a firefighter part that says, “Screw it.” This part shows up when the pressure gets too high. It might lead you to stop exercising or eat whatever you want, because it’s tired of being policed, shamed, or bullied — even by your own thoughts. It just wants you to chill and give your body a break.

And underneath all of that? There are usually exiled parts — deeply tender, hurting parts that still carry old beliefs like, “I’m only lovable if I’m thinner,” or “If I stay in this body, no one will want me.” These parts were never bad — they were just overwhelmed by pain they didn’t know how to handle.

Together, we help all these parts feel seen and heard, not judged. Using IFS alongside EMDR, we guide them to release burdens they’ve been carrying for years and gently integrate them into a more balanced, cooperative inner system.

We also bring in Somatic Experiencing to help you reconnect with your body — not as an object to fix, but as a source of deep wisdom. We slow down. We notice what’s happening inside. We follow your body’s signals. Your body holds the story — but it also holds the key to healing.

This is trauma work that honors every part of you — not just your thoughts, but your emotions, your nervous system, and your lived experience.

You Were Never the Problem

Body image trauma isn’t just about how you look — it’s about how you were treated, especially by the people who were supposed to love you unconditionally.

Many of our parents or caregivers grew up deeply influenced by diet culture, which worships a very narrow, often Eurocentric ideal of beauty. They may have pushed you to fit that mold, believing it was for your own good. It’s painful not to be loved unconditionally. It’s painful not to be accepted just as you are.

You may have grown up in a home where love was tangled with control, where criticism was disguised as “concern,” and where your needs were seen as burdens. But that doesn’t have to be your story forever.

With time, you can develop compassion and understanding for why your parents are the way they are — shaped by their own histories and struggles. At the same time, you don’t need to force your body to change in order to fit into their agenda. Both truths can coexist.

Through this work, you’ll gain clarity and come to honor your heritage — the ancestors who passed down the genes and stories that make you who you are today. There is so much to celebrate about your uniqueness. You are here, you are whole, and you are lovable just as you are.

Here, in this healing space, you can finally offer yourself the unconditional love you may never have received from others.

This is the heart of what we do in EMDR Intensive. We don’t just change how you think about your body — we help heal the root experiences that taught you to disconnect from it in the first place.

If you’ve been carrying this pain for years, please know: healing is possible. You don’t have to fight your body anymore. You can learn to listen, soften, and feel safe in your own skin.

And you don’t have to do it alone.

Curious if EMDR Intensive is right for you?
Let’s talk about what healing could look like.

If you are interested in learning more about my practice, visit the website here.